Review: Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett at Meat Market

Review by Greg Gorton

There is a lot of cabaret and burlesque available to a showgoer in this beautiful city of ours, and Australia is full of some of the most talented performers out there. Still, there is something that sets the work of Bernie Dieter and Velvick Productions apart.

Part of it is definitely the investment in a production design and implementation that places these shows on the world stage. Walking into the Club Kabarett, it was easy to feel like I had stepped into the sort of warehouse nightclub where you need a special key to enter. Instead, for prices below what I could spend for middle-of-the-road pseudoprofessional theatre, I get to experience something truly impressive. The colourful and dynamic lighting design matches that you would expect from the better stars of rock. Despite letting the band play loud and hard, the audio mix ensured not a voice (or shoe) was drowned out. As for those shoes, I’m not entirely sure how they captured a tap-dancer for all to hear in such a setting, but they did so perfectly.

Design sets the mood, but it also sets the expectation. A less-than-stellar performance is forgiven in the back room of an RSL on a Tuesday night but sitting down in a world that sincerely transports me to somewhere filled with grunge and stardust, some exceptional performances will be required.

I don’t understand exactly how the cast list is chosen for these shows. This is only my second Velvick Productions show (after Piper’s Playhouse earlier this year), and the question fascinates me. Is there an insane audition experience ala Triangle of Sadness? does Dieter hunt people down like Nick Fury? Or is it more like classic Mission Impossible episodes where there is a folder of geniuses and the ones best suited for the theme are chosen? All I know is that the folder, if it exists, would be of great value.

It’s not that the performers are technically talented. Yes, Jarred Dewey is a very adept trapeze artist, but he is also the only one who has ever made me tear up. Soliana Erse has me wondering how she physiologically performs her contortion act, but also gives me a very visceral ick. And Caleb Cameron….well, who thought tapdancing could be cool? 

I’d seen the firebreathing Jacqueline Furey’s work before, and it makes a perfect example to my argument. On a technical level, nothing she does is (in my opinion) particularly above and beyond what any fire breather or sword-swallower does. But how she presents her work, how she creates a narrative… It's like seeing David Tennant and Mel Gibson perform Hamlet. They both know all the words, but only one of them is a genius.

It’s this brilliant level of energy and canny knowledge of how to woo an audience that makes Melissa Lee’s hair suspension act (an arguably one-trick pony) so compelling to watch, and so desiring of to watch again. 

And when we say “energy” and “knowledge”, this goes beyond showing off the more impressive skills in the grandest ways. It is more than Dieter’s ground-shattering voice breaking us down with “Into My Arms”. It’s also being willing to take the whole night further. Bright, complex costumes being stripped off mid-air, convincing an audience member to suck cream from your finger, and being willing to make some (sadly) controversial statements in a place where everyone is made to feel welcome. It’s willing to choose some very niche songs to sing, and to literally put your body in the hands of strangers. And it pays off big.

There are parts of the show that you will love more than others. I suspect not everyone will be as hooked on the tapdancing as I was. And there were some unfortunate choices with the runway stage that meant many audience members would have missed some of the wilder moments of the night. But with so many wild moments, I doubt anyone would complain.

A strange, depressing, addition I mention as it does leave an aim of the night unfulfilled. During multiple occasions, Bernie Deiter reiterates the need for community, an end of divisiveness, and an acceptance of who we and our neighbours are. To a degree, Deiter succeeds in creating this space. Despite much sexy gyrating and nudity, there are only calls of encouragement, not heckling. When Deiter asks everyone to put their hands up, all hands go up without hesitation. But when the request is made to speak to your neighbour, not just the person you came with but those people beside you, a very large proportion of the audience avoided it. So, there was love for the performers, for the show, but not entirely for each other. It’s by no means the fault of the show (just like I wouldn’t blame them for the hundreds of phones held up throughout the night), but it is a failing, and one we should perhaps inspect in ourselves. I could not find a single minute thing this show could do better to say “You are safe”, “we are a community”, and “this night is about love”, so what was the missing ingredient?

Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett is a spectacular night, filled with impressive feats by beautiful people who will carefully massage your heart in magical ways. It’s a difficult thing to ask, but for a moment imagine there is a way to escape this world for a short time, turn off your phone, and step into a utopian cabaret to give your mind a rest.

Image Supplied